Come gallop on with me.

June 30, 2008

Labyrinth Torch and Twang

Interesting, there's surprisingly been some talk on some horse blogs recently about socialism, facism, etc., specifically in reference to horse rescue and personal accountability and government helping stupid people who can't apparently make good decisions or help themselves, as if we're cattle or sheep who must be herded about by Bureaucrats Who Know Better, as if that's the answer to what ails us. (Oh yeah? watch this, and then follow the link over to the geniuses in Louisiana.) Talk of good big fat government making us accountable for our sorry feckless selves through taxation and fees and licenses and democratic socialism. Calls for more government. Pushbacks for less.

Talk of neoconservatives being facists.

Talk of liberals being facists.

Fingers pointing this way and that.

Good gods almighty.

Me, I tend to be more on the libertarian side of things politically, a constitutionalist, I'd say, but the more I spend my time thinking about politics the more I find myself a slave to the archons themselves. And I imagine them rolling around in glee because they've managed to lull me right back into the deep sleep, which is exactly where they'd like to see me spend my time. So I attempt to extricate myself.

What is freedom, I ask? (Occasionally, I find it on the back of a fast horse.) And I imagine those archon folk (No, I don't believe they exist in literal terms, I gave that bible-thumping-is-the-inspired-word-of-god approach up years ago, but it's fun to play with the idea anyway.) grimacing at my ability to ask this question. Just asking it makes me a little more so, I think. I know this--it really doesn't have anything to do with Smith and Wesson or Sam Colt.

I go back to my friends the gnostics again--

“The world-spirit in exile must go through the Inferno of matter and the Purgatory of morals to arrive at the spiritual Paradise.” G. Quispel. See The Gnostic World View.

Excerpta de Theodoto, defines this gnosis as the knowledge of "who we were, what we have become; where we were, whereinto we have been thrown; whither we hasten, whence we are redeemed; what is birth and what rebirth."

Learning is remembering, Plato said.

Maybe I'll have an answer by my next go-round. I certainly haven't achieved enlightenment in this one as far as I can tell. Those ridiculous new agers who brag about how they were Cleopatra or some other royal personage in their previous lives have no clue. Very few of us will be or have been kings or queens. This time around, I'm a free woman in the USA, albeit a USA slouching towards socialism and uber political correctness until some of us will be getting arrested for saying what we think. But the ugly side of the reincarnation idea is that you don't necessarily get born back into the same environment twice, I suppose. What's to keep me from coming back as a Muslim woman in Iran the next go-round where I'm stripped of every shred of my humanity except whatever I'd manage to salvage from deep inside of me, whatever part manages against all odds to remember? Could I wind up like this? Plunk me down over there now, and I'd bet good money on it, just for being about as opinionated as any one of the mares down in my barn.

Who's to say?

I've just watched Pan's Labyrinth. A beautiful fairy tale for adults. This is the story of Sophia fallen and redeemed. The hymn of the pearl complete with (warning: spoiler!) ruby red robe of glory at the end. I found it to be an exquisite story about immortality and going home.

About what real freedom is.

Long ago in the Underground Realm…where there are no lies or pain, there lived a Princess who dreamt of the human world. She dreamt of blue skies, the soft breeze and sunshine… One day, eluding her keepers, the Princess escaped. Once outside, the brightness blinded her and erased her memory… She forgot who she was and where she came from. Her body suffered cold, sickness and pain. Eventually, she died. Her father, the King, always knew that the Princess would return, perhaps in another body, in another place, at another time. And he would wait for her, until he drew his last breath, until the world stopped turning…

And it is said that the Princess went back to her father’s kingdom. And that she reigned with justice and a kind heart for many centuries. And that she was loved by all her subjects… And, like most of us, she left behind small traces of her time on earth. Visible only to those who know where to look…

…a long, long time ago in a grey, sad country…There was a magic rose that made whoever plucked it immortal. But no one would dare go near it because its thorns were full of mortal poison. So amongst the men tales of pain and death were told in hushed voices. But there was no talk of eternal life… because men fear pain more than they want immortality. So every day the rose wilted unable to bequeath his gift to anyone. Alone and forgotten at the top of that mountain. Forgotten until the end of time…

I don't know much. But I know this. It's a labyrinth with twists and turns.

And there's no Utopia here in this flawed materia. (And it's frankly immaterial to me whether you agree with that or not. Your path is your own.) Nor will there be, as far as I can make out.

April 13, 2008

Sunday Morning Torch and Twang

"It's a rather joyous song . I like very much the last verse. I remember singin' it to Bob Dylan after his last concert in Paris. The morning after, I was having coffee with him and we traded lyrics . Dylan * especially liked this last verse "And even though it all went wrong , I stand before the Lord of song With nothing on my lips but Hallelujah"

Leonard COHEN (interview,Paroles et Musiques,1985)

*....and Bob Dylan sung live "Hallelujah" during his 1988' tour

You say I took the name in vain
I don't even know the name
But if I did, well, really, what's it to you?
There's a blaze of light in every word
It doesn't matter which you heard
The holy or the broken Hallelujah

I did my best, it wasn't much
I couldn't feel, so I learned to touch
I've told the truth, I didn't come to fool you
And even though it all went wrong
I'll stand before the Lord of Song
With nothing on my lips but Hallelujah

April 11, 2008

Friday Night Torch and Twang

I've heard there was a secret chord
That David played, and it pleased the Lord
But you don't really care for music, do you?
Well, it goes like this, the fourth, the fifth
The minor fall, the major lift
The baffled king composing Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Well, your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you
She tied you to a kitchen chair
She broke your throne, she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Well, baby, I've been here before.
I've seen this room, and I've walked this floor.
I used to live alone before I knew you.
But I've seen your flag on the marble arch,
And love is not a victory march,
It's a cold and it is a broken Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Well, there was a time when you'd let me know
What's really going on below,
But now you never show that to me, do you?
But remember when I moved in you,
And the Holy Ghost was moving too,
And every breath we drew was Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Well, maybe there is a God above,
But all that I've ever learned from love
Was how to shoot somebody who outdrew you.
It's not a cry that you hear at night,
And it is not somebody who has seen the light
It's a cold and it is a broken Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Hallelujah

Hallelujah

April 5, 2008

Canyons and Ravines

beautiful photo by josh summers

I went up to the light of truth
as into a chariot,
and truth took me across canyons and ravines
and preserved me against waves smashing the cliffs.
She was my haven and my salvation
and left me in the arms of immortal life.
She went with me, soothed me, kept me from error.
She was and is the light of truth.

~ Song 38, Songs of Solomon

My children's 17-year-old cousin died in a car crash in Albuquerque Friday afternoon. He was returning home from a sports event. Changing lanes from left to right, his SUV clipped the back end of a city vehicle, slammed into a concrete wall, and he lost his young life. His cousin, also 17, in the front passenger seat survived, as did the other 17-year-old friend in the back seat. All honor students. All athletes. No drugs or alcohol involved. All with their lives, all of that brimming potential, everything, everything still ahead of them.

I had almost 30 nieces and nephews from my first marriage. I count this young man among them, even though I haven't seen him for several years because I'm no longer part of that familly. I loved him. I've known him since the day he was born. I remember he and his older brother tumbling over me like puppies when they were toddlers, giggling, and their mother scolding them.

This weekend has been spent consoling my two children, who can only say in the middle of the tears that their cousin was just here and now he's gone.

Gone.

Where?

I don't know. I can't tell them. And when I struggled to explain the inexplicable, they both reminded me that we are all sparks of the divine.

Pilgrims.

Sojourners.

Apparently they've been listening to me.

Such utter emptiness. I cannot imagine the agony of this young man's parents. No easy answers.

I don't buy the Sunday School explanation any more.

Yesterday, we painted the brand new bee hives with a coat of clean, bright white. Sat in the sunshine together. Decorated the front entryways with images of bees and flowers and horses. All painfully aware of who is missing.

I am struck by the warmth of the horses' breath in the mornings when I feed them. I want to wrap myself in the warm aliveness of their coats, but press my head against them instead and listen to their sighs.

I am surprised when I wake up to see the sunrise reflected back at me on the mesa, which is burning red. Where is this place? I ask myself. Where am I in this four-poster bed at 6:00 AM in my ranch house at the foot of the mountain exactly? I clutch the comforter, being washed downstream in a current too strong. Too strong for swimming to shore.

I fry bacon. I wash dishes. I almost resist the temptation to hold my own dear children in my arms and kiss them repeatedly, and tell them that we are safe and together at this moment.

This moment in time.

March 29, 2008

My Little Pony

March 11, 2008

Tuesday Morning Torch and Twang

It's easy in the middle of our comfortable, everyday American lives to forget the price of our freedom.
.
I love this. And I love these courageous men and women.

February 22, 2008

A Varmint is my Co-Pilot

nigel1.jpg

Despite his instructor's attempts to console him, varmint hat aficionado Nigel is saddened by the news that he didn't pass the Hunter Safety Test.

Obviously he didn't study Chapter 17: Game Care in the New Mexico Hunter Education Manual. The one that my 10-year-old son knows verbatim. And that I will too soon with all the super excellent study help I've been providing, given my er ... vast expertise on the topic.

A question from the sample test:

3. Safe hunters do not carry ___________________ over their shoulders. They could be mistaken for _______________________.

If you need help filling in the blanks, well ... please try to refrain from hunting around my neck of the woods.

Thanks to the Transylvanian Horseman for sending me this fabulous fabulous photo. The best varmint hat I've seen yet. I'm sure the fellow at the local grocery store would be green with envy.

nigel2.jpg

February 9, 2008

Another Eve

A medieval image drawing on the female figure of Wisdom crowned with truth.
A medieval image drawing on the female figure of Wisdom crowned with truth.

I like this gnostic myth. Another Eve is described in the Gnostic Christian texts--

Here, her descriptions are those of a guide, instructor, and even a savior figure. Her essence and actions serve to provide gnosis and illumination for humanity. She is an "other" Eve.

As in the Genesis story, she decides to eat from the tree of gnosis and to share its enlightenment with Adam:

Then their intellect became open. For when they had eaten, the light of acquaintance had shone upon them. When they saw that the ones who had modelled them had the form of beasts they loathed them: they were very aware from that day, the authorities knew that truly there was something mightier than they.

Worldsoul.jpg
Anima Mundi, or the Worldsoul, from Thurneisser zum Thurn, Quinta Essentia, (Leipzig: 1574)

If you're interested, you can read the whole article here.

Comments are welcome, most certainly. But I'm not really interested in engaging in any theological debates about this myth vs. that myth, etc. To put things into context on my end, I don't think any of these stories are historical facts, but metaphors and allegories instead. I used to think that "myth" meant something fictional or untrue. But on this quest for gnosis, I've come to realize that myths are more true than any history. It has something to do with the Anima Mundi, the Worldsoul, Sophia, Christos, the riches of human consciousness ... but I can't quite articulate that yet.

It has something to do with how wonderfully each of us are made.

Heck, I'm writing my very own myth every day. And so, I think, are you.

February 7, 2008

The things I don't care about

care_about.jpg

By Dianne Sylvan. Read it all.

Here are the things I don't care about:

I don't care what the name of your religion is.
I don't care what the names of your gods are.
I don't care how old your religion is.
I don't care if your great-great-whatever grandmother passed down your famtrad Book of Shadows under the watchful eye of the Inquisition.
I don't care if an entire civilization worshipped your Goddess for ten thousand years.
I don't care if you made Her up based on manga or Tolkien or a dream you had.
I don't care where you place your altar.
I don't care which direction you call Earth.
I don't care how psychic you are.
I don't care if you're smarter than me.
I don't care why you eat meat, or don't.
...

What do I care about?

I care that your religion has made you a kinder, more compassionate person.
I care that you can hold down a job.
I care that you're growing past whatever happened to you as a child or last year.
I care that your gods help you become stronger without coddling you.
I care that you are willing and able to adapt and change as your life does.
I care that you care about the Earth.
I care that you care about someone and something outside yourself.
I care that you practice your religion with devotion and reverence.
I care that you respect others' paths.
I care that you never stop learning.
I care that you can conduct adult relationships with respect and understanding.
I care that you get how hilarious life is.
I care that you know when to ask for help.
I care that you realize that someone will always be smarter, more powerful, and more together than you.
...

February 2, 2008

Saturday Night Torch and Twang

I've gotten some funny emails about about my punk rock stage. (FYI, the bar was called Crazy Mama's. We used to make the floor shake.)

I don't know. Maybe having shorn purple hair was just the inevitable result of too much time spent in the barn wearing overalls. Although you can't blame it on the horses. (That's easy for me to say. Our kids aren't teenagers ... yet.)

This is in honor of all us girls in the 80s who wore combat boots and party dresses ...

(I just bought Dennis the mother of all MP3 players, a big hawg of a Zune. He was downloading some Billy Idol last evening, and all of a sudden I remembered how much I loved that angry young man with an attitude and all that leather. There was a small dance party in our kitchen last evening. I had on my barn boots. And Carhartt coveralls. Lord, I didn't see that coming 25 years ago.)

Saturday Night Torch and Twang

Whoa Nelly. We just got home from seeing this. I remember reading some Upton Sinclair at some point in my life. College? High School? From my parents' library at home?

This was an absolutely astonishing film. Dennis and I looked around at the audience, and everyone seemed to be over 40. I heard on the radio the other day that people are reading less and less these days. Are they talking about everyone, or just the youngsters? I find that ... sobering.


From Wikipedia
. Time magazine's Richard Schickel named the film one of the Top 10 Movies of 2007, ranking it at #9, calling Daniel Day Lewis’ performance “astonishing”, and calling the film “a mesmerizing meditation on the American spirit in all its maddening ambiguities: mean and noble, angry and secretive, hypocritical and more than a little insane in its aspirations.”

Oh. Yeah.

January 22, 2008

Tuesday Night Torch and Twang

I give you the side splittingly funny ... Achmed the Dead Terrorist.

(Warning: nothing PC here and some bad language.)

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