you've had to make it past this 1,350-pound dude

with a bowl of Piñon's apple sauce and antibiotics.

Twice.

Once in the morning. Once in the evening.

You'd never think that anything this big could sneak up on you as quiet as a cat while you're fumbling with the gate latch. (Most of the time, you would not describe Toby as very surreptitious.) But he can. However, he usually gives himself away with all of that loud smacking and licking as he stretches his muzzle ever so slowly and delicately towards the bowl over which you're hunkering.

A stern, "Toby, quit!" sends him scurrying away with his feelings hurt.

The Big Boo still doesn't believe it when you tell him for about the hundredth time that he's not going to get any.